Marriage is finding that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life ...

Simmi likes to mimic everyone and while we were waiting for langar to be served she started telling me about this conversation she had with her mom on Saturday.

Simmi:“Neet, Yesterday I was trying to help Mom out and listen what happened"

Shanivaar,9:30 am:

Simmi: Hello Paapa. 

Paapa: Hanji Betaji. Sab thik thak?

Simmi: Hanji Paapa. Everything is good. You doing good? Where is Mom?

Paapa: I am ironing my 1000 rupee notes – thanks to your Mom. She is dealing with the maids. Let me call her. 

Background: "Sukhhhhhiiii, Sukhhhhhhiiiii.....Chheti aa. Simmi is on the phone. Whenever there is need for you to be around you are always away. Come soon. "

“I have to wash clothes, cook, clean the house - I have 100 other things to look into."

"For everything you have maids and helpers and still you complain you have to do work. My money is wasted on maids and still you are not happy. Let them go then. At least it will save me money"

"Gardner has come, he is asking for money to put some new plants, go talk to him."

Mommy: Hellooooo

Simmi: Hello Mommy, Ki haal chaal?

Mommy: Everything is fine here Puttarji. You woke up? Had tea?

Simmi: Hanji Mommy, sab thik thak.

Mommy: Maid came? Is she working properly, saaf safai naal, coming on time?

Simmi: Hanji Mommy. Tusi Hor Sunao ? What were you doing?

Mommy: Is there a single day in my life where your Baapu will let me live comfortably. No !! He won’t help me in anything , to top it will bring five other friends home for Lunch and keeps ordering  aa banalo, oo banalo. 

 Today when I was putting clothes to dry, I saw a 1000 rupee note lurching out of the back pocket and then 4 more were inside.  I asked him how this came here. Mainu kende "Teri galti aa, you should have checked pockets before washing".

Simmi go ask him what is there in his pockets that I will have to check ? Every time I go to the mall with him he will say I have only 500 rupees, can’t shop more, when I buy some extra veggies he will say “Spending money is your hobby”. What is there to check in the pockets?

 I have spent whole of my life begging him for money. I do all the household work, so what if there are maids, they don’t do it on their own, one has to run after them. All my life working for his house I got back problem, blood pressure and now don't know what else is yet to come my way.

If the story ended here I would have still told myself "Sukhi - It is ok. Rabb da naam lela" but it doesn’t end here. Yesterday Pammi bhua called and said we are coming to visit you and your Baapu happily said “You will be staying with us no matter what.” She is coming with her husband, kids, in laws  - there will be 10 people in the house. Who will do the arrangement for their khatirdaari? Sukhi obviously, 37 years back this is what he married me for. Simmi I am telling you, in my father's house your Jasbir Maami (Mom's sister in law) doesn’t pour a drop of water in the glass to drink. In that house there is nothing that happens without her permission. And here look at me I am ........tuuuuu tuuuuu tuuuuu (phone disconnects - network problem)

Shanivaar, 9:50 a.m.

Simmi: Hello Papa

Paapa: Hanji Betaji. Phone got disconnected. Mummy is saying that she will call you after sometime. She is on another line talking to Pammi Bhua.

Simmi: Papa, are they coming to visit us? They are gonna stay with us for some time?

Paapa: Yes yes, I insisted they stay with us. She is coming with her family. 

Simmi: Papa, I think you should be more considerate towards mom. It is difficult for her to handle it all on her own. I hope you are not taking her for granted. 

Paapa: Achaaaaa, Okkkkkkk, I will talk to her.

Shanivaar, 11:00 a.m.

Mommy: Hellooooo

Simmi: Hanji Mommy. Hogi gall Pammi Bhua naal? All ok?

Mommy: Yea yea, she is fine. O sab chhad. What did you tell Paapa?

Simmi: About what?

Mommy: About what? You told your father that he has to take care of me. Now you will teach your Baapu how to handle things.

Simmi: No Mom, I was just…

Mommy: You kids, staying away from home , earning little money , become very smart. Now you can say anything to parents. You know how much your father loves you. Every day he will ask me “Simmi da phone aaya”, If you don’t call in evening, he will ask “Is Simmi fine. Aaj phone nahi aaya “ and you lecture him? This is how you speak to your Dad? Durr Fitte Moo

Simmi: I thought you were….

Mommy: Don’t speak now. Bahut zubaan aagi moo vich. Your father has made so many FDs in bank so that children will use it later and enjoy life. He has brought another flat in Ludhiana, he said "We will gift this to Simmi". All this he is doing to hear lecture from you ? Yesterday I made Alu Gobhi – and Paapa was missing his kids because Alu Gobhi is your favorite. When you were kid , we made special arrangement for milkman to give cream-rich milk delivered to house early morning and paid him 100 rupees extra in those days. You know in those days what was the value of 100  rupees.

Simmi: Mom I thought you were upset with Pammi Bhua co…….

Mommy: What Pammi Bhua? Hain? What Pammi Bhua? Last time when we went to Patiala you know she took me to the famous market where I bought 6 punjabi juttis. She didn’t let me pay a single penny. She said “Penji, you are like my sister”. When you were born she gave 500 rupees and gold earrings for you as shagan, and for your brother’s Lohri she gave him a gold chain. Pammi and I were dancing Giddha on your brother’s Lohri and everyone in the locality was so jealous seeing our clothes – I was wearing the fulkari Pammi brought from Patiala. What wrong has Pammi done to you?

Simmi: I was just trying to help you. I thought…

Mommy: Very good puttar ji. Giving lecture to your Dad is very good help. Haina? Enough.

Simmi: Ok. M Sorry.

Mommy: Hun Sorry yaad aagi ? Breakfast kar leya?

Simmi: I just had tea. Will have something now.

Mommy: You only know how to give lecture on time. Why don’t you eat and sleep on time. Now go eat. We will talk in evening. “

I wish I could capture her expressions in the blog which added to the jocosity. By the time Simmi finished we were served with garam garam pooriyaann , chhole and kheer. Despite all the daily bickering that her parents go through Simmi had immovable faith in their relationship and said “Neet, I pray to babaij that when I get married I have a partnership with my husband just like the one between my parents – so honest, faithful and spicingly loving that even their children cannot come in between”. Relishing the kheer she sang :

“Chitteh chawl jina ne punn kite 

Rabb ne banayeeyan jodian “